Despite what many might feel is strong evidence to the contrary, there appears to me to be an orderliness to the universe that indicates things are indeed unfolding as they should. Something that keeps the stars up there and the oceans down here. Some great planning department in the sky that co-ordinates our comings and goings.
Some celestial Director of Human Resources, for example, who found Eugene Moos a job as undersecretary of agriculture in the United States. And encouraged Howard Buffett to open up his own food company in Illinois.
Pshaw, you say. People’s occupations don’t have anything to do whatsoever with their names. Jobs are jobs and names are names and there’s no link between them. It is all just decided by random selection.
Oh ya?
How many examples would it take to convince you otherwise? Two? Three?
Would you change your mind if I told you about Dr. Ernie Doktor, who owns a veterinary clinic in Alberta? Or if I mentioned Laura and Susan Homer who are real estate agents in Ontario?
Now that I think about it, names are coming to me like a flood.
Billy Potash is an organic farmer in British Columbia. Heather Apple is president of the Canadian Heritage Seed Project, a group dedicated to preserving rare fruit trees. Pat Hayes was hired as a parliamentary secretary to Ontario’s minister of agriculture.
What do I have to do to make a believer out of you?
Do I have to tell you about Gord Surgeoner, an Ontario doctor? Or John Pasteur, a cattle rancher in Alberta? Or Father Ray Masse, a Catholic priest in Ontario?
Maybe you’re one of those real skeptics who knows there is no such thing as Fate or an overall Plan.
So, it wouldn’t do much good to tell you about Florida sex researcher Dr. Carol Darling. Or Lydia Basil,who’s compiling a Quebec vegetable dictionary. Or Ontario Cattlemen’s Association member Dick Heard.
I don’t know. I guess it’s a tough sell. Did Milan Panic become prime minister of Yugoslavia by accident? Why didn’t Dr. Chu go into psychiatry instead of becoming a renowned dentist?
It’s complicated, that’s for sure. You hear about a ball coach whose last name is Wyn or a U.S. potato-virus researcher who goes by the name of Stephen Poe and you wonder.
But then, you read that the plastic surgeon who has invented a way of lengthening the penis goes by the name of Dr. Robert Stubbs and you start to question yourself. Maybe there is no connection between your name and what you’ll end up doing in life.
On the other hand, if you’re name is Bill Dozer you might check out a course in road construction.
Or Rich Guy? My suggestion for you might be to forget computer processing and get straight into law, banking, politics or better yet: hockey.
©1993 Jim Hagarty
